from other Theistic Satanists
"I wasn’t raised religious so I didn’t know who God or Jesus or even Satan was, I think my family wanted me to have a childhood with religion but when I was 14 I got drawn to the inverted pentagram and dark imagery. I still didn’t know who the devil was or anything about religion. I didn’t pay attention in religious education in high school. but I just randomly started calling myself a satanist. I believed in him even though I didn’t know him. I would sit in a dark room by my self and just enjoy the atmosphere of the dark. I didn’t know how I pictured Satan to be but I always liked the fire and hell. I was a satanist for a couple of months until I lost my grandad and then I was I a dark place and depressed and tried to take my life till a preacher came to my high school. He told me about the gospel of Jesus Christ and that he loves me and forgives me of everything I do if I believed in him, you know the usual Christian message. I became a Christian and gave my life to Jesus and was a born again Christian for over 2 years but even when I was Christian I felt Satan with me. I would have a dark presence look at me at night, it was intense but I didn’t know what it was. I would read the bible and when Satan was mentioned I would get excited for some reason, his name would stand out like a light to a moth even more then the name Jesus. I would go on eBay or Amazon a look at satanic clothing for some reason. When I would look for a movie when I seen anything to do with the occult or Satanism I would get drawn to it and would have to watch it. I then decided to leave Christianity awhile after all that happened but I would still feel that dark energy in my room looking at me. When I left Christianity my first words were "Hail Satan", it just randomly popped out of my mouth. When I was no longer a Christian I was a atheist for a year, I dabbled in the occult and I would dabble in Norse paganism but spent most of my time being a atheist, mainly a atheistic Satanist. I followed the TST then I randomly had this urge to pray to Satan so I would go on google and try and look for prayers or go on YouTube and try and watch people pray to Satan. Until I looked on Amazon and randomly was drawn to Marie Ravensoul at Satan’s Alter book. I bought it with no hesitation and I started to say the prayers from there. From then in I became a theistic Satanist(devil worshipper) and then I devoted my life to Satan and it felt right it, like it was meant to be that way. He has always been there with me from birth. I wasn’t a planned birth so I wonder if he had anything to do with it? Satan has helped me fight addiction and has helped me through rough times. He gave me a reason to live so I live my life for him, he’s my God and my father, my everything and I love him and thank him for being patient and never leaving me even when I would worship his enemy. Hail Satan".
"As many others on the left hand path, I did not approach Father Satan first.
It was a beautiful, cold and breezy night. April, 2021.
I was standing outside in my garden at 2:30am.
The leaves and branches were blowing in the breeze, it was stary night, it was so majestic.
I was in the middle of a ritual, and I felt a very strong presence around me. This presence seemed to engulf me. My whole being, my aura and my spirit was what felt like being hugged and embraced by this very powerful and overwhelming energy. I have proudly walked on the left hand path for years now so I could feel that Satan was indeed here with me and is currently making himself known to me- I knew it was him. Relaxed, honoured and surprised are some words to describe how I felt. With respect I asked him why he has made himself present, and I stated aloud that I am at one with the demonic divine, that I stand with the infernal empire. That night Satan gave me mind-blowing wisdom that I needed to hear, he gave me the most realistic, but comforting advice that really helped me navigate my way through life situations I was facing at the time. Not only did he approach me which was a massive honour but the absolute divine timing of his arrival into my life was just so aligned. It was an amazing experience to say the least. With his incredible wisdom Father Satan made me feel safe and assured that the universe is supporting me. The energy he brought with him was so powerful, it was rejuvenating for my soul.
Nearly two years on and Father Satan is an important part of my life, a huge figure in my Witchcraft practice and my Souls evolution on this physical plane of Planet Earth. With Satan’s wisdom, guidance, love, advice, support I have climbed mountains I wasn’t even aware existed. I have infinite gratitude to Father Satan, and I feel honoured to dedicate myself to him as he has dedicated himself to me in many ways. I honour Satan’s energy daily and with pride. The appreciation for his presence in my human life and his part in my souls evolution is something that cannot be described in human words".
"I found Satan through always feeling unfulfilled, unheard, and unloved in the Protestant religion I was raised in. It was around year 6 or 7 that I started feeling as though there was something else there for me. I continued to search around and came across Satan and Satanism for what it really was. That was around 3 years ago.
Today I'm a proudly dedicated Theistic Satanist who is content in my religion and who will very soon be working with Azazel".
"Why Satan? Why a witch? Why a Satanic Witch? As requested, I hope to provide the most comprehensive answer I have ever provided. There is going to be some very personal insights to share which this piece and I am happy to have them shared under my Satanic Witch name ‘Grandier Diabolique’. A title I do not yet feel I have achieved as there needs to be more study, workings and less procrastination!
The world was thrown into a great spiritual awakening during the pandemic in 2020 and although I was aware I was different, I had this highlighted like a brick through a window around early October. Prior to 2020 my aunt taught me intuitive tarot and she is clairvoyant and reads professionally. When I apply myself, I can do a pretty good read. In the past I’ve been able to predict break-ups and when I was young, I manifested an Optimus Prime toy! Seriously, though another story for another day.
Back to 2020 around early October I was doing a menial household task when I was hit by a vision of the death of a colleague and friend, shaking it off as an intrusive thought brought on by ongoing depression and anxiety issues I was rocked to the core when I discovered whilst on duty two weeks later that the vision came to pass.
I carried the weight of the heartbreak and the guilt that I ignored it and that I could have done something about it. Such guilt I came to realise is disproportionate and has been an affliction that has plagued and hindered me for much of my life. The main source? The Church.
I sought out answers and I am still seeking them now. I started to research more divination and Wicca and found myself spiralling through the occult. It transpired that another colleague was in a “witch group” and there being no coincidences she helped me traverse through the start of path. One day around a year later, a bully I work with, who is in a position of authority within my department made a colleague cry through being his authentic shit self. I’ve often disliked this individual and stared at the back of his head willing him to come off his bike and break the hands that are so important to him. I did not even realise I was doing it. Later that week he hit a cattle grid in the rain and badly broke his wrist, well to say I shit myself was understatement. I told my friend who would tell me “sorry dude, you ain’t a wiccan, but you sure as fuck are a witch!” So began the awakening of this witch.
2022, I was awoken in the night by a memory, during the heatwaves and a my first bout of COVID. I was reminded of being ill as a child around 4 and waking on the sofa to see a hazy blue bodied mass with a bright yellow loins head looking fearsomely at me I screamed the house down and was comforted by my mother, I’m sure this was dismissed as a bad dream though I know what I saw! I remember a separate occasion sitting on the back doorstep and the same figure belted through the house towards the back door and I ran! Research was made last summer and I was made aware of President Buer. Buer didn’t mean to frighten me I know as much as feel that and have marvelled at his visage and what he represents. In a group on facebook once Buer was mocked and I urged the poster to rethink that attitude or rethink his influences to the infernal divine.
Buer was kept at bay from me for years because of the conditioning of the church, I had to go to Sunday school and attend all manner of Christian gatherings associated with it, well I can tell you it’s no better than the brainwashing of the Hitler Youth. My grandmother who’s mind is starting to deteriorate is becoming more vocal about the systemic abuses suffered in the name of Yaweh as a child herself, bibles were for beatings back then, I can tell you.
So through to today, looking back and piecing together instances and thought processes in adult life I see how I have arrived to this point. My eyes are open and I will no longer be controlled by conditioning from a tyrannical institution that has more than had it’s day.
The Infernal Divine of Satans Kingdom is laid bare and it’s beautiful, it’s not fire and brimstone and internal damnation, it’s beauty, art, sexual freedom and liberation. It’s eating cake, it’s that beautiful stone cottage on a cliff by the sea, it’s in the meow of every cat.
I found Satan indirectly through shadow work, reading and meditation. I have been moved to tears by art depicting Baphomet and Pentagrams and Pentacles and the writings of Marie Ravensoul and Rev. Cain.
He’s calling, through showing me the vast range of what he and his Kingdom have to offer. I’m growing I’m waking, I’m not afraid, I’m on my way.
He loves us as he was once made to walk his own fire and accepts and understands.
In Nomine Satanas
"I discovered Him when I was in senior year of high school. Well… I guess everyone already knows but for me, it was when I felt His presence calling me. I was exploring my identity at the time and interests and following whatever spoke out to me. Seeing that there were Satanic organizations, even if they were atheistic… I don’t know, something about it just spoke to my soul. I needed to figure out why I wanted to be a part of them so badly. I suppose that was Lord Satan telling me to come under His wraps. I eventually landed on theistic Satanism and wanted to feel initiated so I prayed to him when I woke up and when I went to bed daily for about a month, stopped doing it, then recently came back to the tradition when I was looking for meaning and navigating my adult life. It really does feel like He is there for you and as if He were a home for you to live with. I sincerely do not regret worshipping Him in the slightest; devil worship is definitely one of the most enjoyable daily routines to have and He always encourages you to better yourself. Hail Satan!"
I am so grateful for everyone who shares their testimony with me, and for giving permission to be posted here.
If you would like to write a testimonial to be shared here too,
you can send it to me via the contact form on the Home page.
Thank you for being open about your Satanic Devotion.